Making Sense of Behaviour: A Path to Empathy and Understanding

Introduction: Unraveling Behaviour through a Compassionate Lens

Behaviour is an intrinsic part of our identity, not just a trait ascribed to children or those who pose challenges. Essentially, everything we do is a form of behaviour, which can range from positive and appropriate to negative and emotionally driven. By considering our actions through a compassionate lens, we can better understand the mechanisms of behaviour and thus create a more empathetic world.

Behaviour: It is Universal and Has a Function

Our actions, whether it's fetching a glass of water when thirsty or offering someone a gift, are behaviours with specific functions. They meet a need or a desire, be it basic or intricate. However, our focus often fixates on negative behaviours that we find troublesome or do not understand, which can inadvertently overshadow the positive ones. The behaviours we pay attention to are often reinforced by our reactions, suggesting that we might be missing opportunities to encourage more of the behaviours we desire. The key lies in striking a balance, reinforcing positive behaviours and managing challenging ones with sensitivity.

The Choice Between Positive and Negative Behaviour

Every moment presents us with a choice – to embrace a positive behaviour or succumb to a negative one. This decision-making is a skill that requires emotional intelligence and the ability to manage emotions. For instance, consider a heated political debate. A politician struggling to maintain control might resort to raising their voice or evading questions, behaviours prompted by the situation's demands exceeding their skills. On the other hand, a seasoned debater would remain composed, indicating a higher ability to access their skills under pressure.

Why Do We Exhibit Less Favourable Behaviours?

Why do we sometimes choose less Favourable behaviours? The answer lies in their effectiveness or our inability to access the required skills at that moment. When the demands of the situation supersede an individual's skills, challenging behaviours arise. This phenomenon isn't exclusive to adults; it's also prevalent in children, especially those with neurological differences like autism, ADHD, PDA, or sensory issues. These children may have unique learning needs and might lack coping skills to manage their emotions, leading to complex behaviours. It's crucial to remember that every behaviour corresponds to a feeling, which, in turn, signifies an unmet need. Focusing on these needs rather than the resulting behaviour can help uncover viable solutions.

The Function of Behaviour: A Key to Understanding

Understanding that behaviour serves as a functional tool to meet an individual's needs can provide valuable insights. The behaviour might be a means to escape a situation, seek attention, provide sensory support, or obtain a desirable item. By recognising the function behind a behaviour, we can identify what skills are lacking or inaccessible when the individual is stressed or emotionally challenged. Supporting these skills can facilitate the teaching of new, more appropriate behaviours.

Why is Finding the Function Useful?

Misunderstanding the function of a behaviour can lead to unsuccessful interventions, causing an escalation of the issue or the emergence of more intrusive behaviours. For instance, suppose a child's behaviour is to escape a particular demand. In that case, understanding the function of that behaviour allows us to provide appropriate coping mechanisms or alternatives that satisfy the underlying need without the necessity for the behaviour to escalate.

How to Determine the Function of a Behaviour

Functional assessments or analyses offer systematic ways to gather information about specific behaviours. By observing the antecedent (what happens before), the behaviour itself, and the consequence (what happens after), we can understand the variables affecting an individual's actions. For instance, lack of sufficient sleep or the presence of a specific person might trigger certain behaviours. Understanding the function of behaviour is empowering for families and services alike, even though support in the process is often helpful.

Conclusion: Compassion and Understanding in Behaviour Management

Behaviour, a universal part of human identity, is an intricate dance of emotions, needs, and situational demands. As we grow more understanding of its mechanisms and functions, we are better equipped to approach it with compassion and empathy, thereby creating a more supportive environment for all. Remember, behind every behaviour lies an unmet need - shifting our focus from the behaviour to the need is the first step towards more effective solutions.

Every step forward counts, no matter how small, and remember, you're doing your best. Don't let anyone, including yourself, convince you otherwise.

Interested to learn more about this approach? Sign up for our free mini-course, “Why is Behaviour Simply Misunderstood”, and start your journey towards understanding and managing behaviour today.